…in just a few short days.
I had no warning. The view that soothed my heart and healed my anxieties whenever the world became too much for me was gone, just like that. I allowed this loss of control, this loss of beauty to break me. I shut myself off from the outside literally by not going out, closing all the shutters and blinds, and only looking out my front window and door.
I even avoided my morning ritual of communing with my Goddesses because their altar is in front of a window that looks out onto the healing view I’ve embraced for 20 years.
Then this morning I decided to come to terms with it all. I sat down before my altar and asked my Goddesses why this happened and what I must learn from it.
I asked, “Why did you allow me to lose this beautiful view that was so healing for me all these years.”
They replied in full force, as they always do.
“It was never yours to lose.”
Damn. But wait. They weren’t done.
“The beauty is not gone, it’s still there in your mind and heart. The peace it brought you is still yours to embrace. You just have to work a little harder to find it now.”
They are right. The hills, the horses, the skyline is all still there. I just have to find a way around the barn to see it. So it may not at my fingertips, but yes, it’s still there.
They weren’t finished with me yet. Yep. There was more.
“Focus on the beauty that is yours to behold.”
I think they were referring to my flower beds that have been sorely neglected of late. I’m not even going to take a picture to show you how unkempt they’ve become. It’s too embarrassing.
So, yeah.
My Goddesses bring me strength and healing. And sometimes they do it with a compassionate swat upside my head.
Janina Grey 